mercredi, septembre 12

Let's talk about it

I can’t seem to kick this sadness…it’s been lingering around for days. (For some reason I keep wanting to take showers, to be alone and silent.) It’s like living in some kind of cloud, somehow the day passes by and I can’t remember what I did or if it went by fast or slow. I left Tony a terrible voice message on my drive home when I stopped in some random small town. I kept almost falling asleep at the wheel so I pulled off to get some coffee and the only place to go was a Burger King. Basically everything about it was depressing…the overhead neon lighting, the people in it, the fact that I was alone and it was raining. It felt like some kind of alternate universe of sadness. He called me back to see if I was ok but I didn’t pick up, in fact, I didn’t answer anyone’s phone calls or text messages. I’ve just kind of been letting the phone ring. Sorry that I’m being so miserable and awful but lately I just don’t know how to relate to anyone/anything/any situation. I’m tired of talking about it already. Yes, I’m leaving. But there has to be something else we can talk about. (…this is sounding much more dramatic then I intended. I only want to say I’m sad, I don’t feel like I fit in, I miss you, I’ll be fine…except right now I’m not, take care.)

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